The Start

Welcome to the Crip Guy Blog! You might be wondering what this blog is all about. Well, I have a Genetic disease called Duchenne Muscular Dystrophy. It's a pretty shitty disease, think ALS lite. I started off walking, climbing, and breathing. Over the course of my almost 33 years, I have lost the ability to walk, stand, breathe, and feed myself. I can't move most of my limbs luckily I still have movement in my hands, all my writing and art are brought to you by crippled wrists. If you hate my drawings I am blaming the cripple thing don't you feel terrible now? 

Despite an awful starting deck, I have lived longer and done more than I thought possible. I went through mainstream school, graduated from RIT with an Electrical Mechanical Engineering degree, lived independently twice, worked as a data scientist, and had my heart broken on more than one occasion. Even with all of those accolades on most days I still feel like I failed, I wasn't able to keep my accomplishments. On top of that, I still want more out of life. I want more adventure, love, hope, friendship, connection, independence, fun, and purpose. 

This blog will try to be the answer to this desire. I will tell you mostly true stories from my life; my losses, triumphs, failures, and hopes. You will learn about my disastrous and nonexistent love life. I will cover some heavy topics like death, suffering, heartbreak, depression, and connection. Through all of it, I will try to make you laugh or snort or smile. Whether you're a crip or non-crip life is hard I won't lie but it's also hilarious and fun. I will try to show you that even in the worst of times you are not alone. When you can't see a way forward I have been there. When your challenges are overwhelming and life doesn't seem fair I will be here telling jokes and embarrassing myself on the internet for you. I don't know who you are but I love you. And for now, this is everything I can give. One more thing I try to draw a comic or illustration for each post because I am an overachiever.

Do you like puns, crips, crypts, vampires, and weird inspiration? Well, you have come to the right place. The name of the comic this week is crip-tic guy. I hope you enjoy it. 

Well now is the weird inspiration part. I have failed. Now you might be wondering what my failure credentials are so I will tell you. I failed to walk, I started late, and took my last step at around nine years old (overachiever). Logically I know that failure was not my fault I was just put into a shitty body. I failed every romantic relationship I tried to start; some spectacularly (that’s for another comic). I could not become an engineer. I failed to get an engineering job after college. I have failed to maintain most of my long-term friendships. I have failed to breathe by myself. I remember I was in my dorm room not wanting to call my parents because I knew it would make my situation real. I have failed to be independent and to live independently. I have failed all the large goals I have set for myself. 

But as bad as that sounds it made me who I am, and I don’t want to be anyone else. It allows me to love people more deeply especially when they are hurting. I know what it feels like to not be good enough (you are good enough). Another great thing about failing is that I have a lot to talk about that is hopefully interesting, lucky you. I’m not going to lie to you, but constant failure does have a cost. Can I tell you a secret? I have thought about giving up on multiple occasions. Even now it is a constant struggle. I’m not telling you this so you can feel sorry for me, I’m telling you this to let you know that I understand the feeling of wanting to give up. If you ever feel like giving up, I’m here as much as I can be, I have your back. I can promise you this if you continue to fail and you do not give up your story will be awesome. 

With that said, I hope you fail (I don’t think he is good at this inspirational thing); I hope you do not always succeed. I hope the person you like doesn’t like you back. I hope the job you want doesn’t want you. I want you to experience hardship. I want you to experience loneliness. I’m paraphrasing this next part from my friend, but failure leads to good writing. In my opinion, this means that without a challenge you do not have a story worth writing. You might be surprised but I have experienced some challenges and my story is extraordinary. If I can help you through some tough days or at least make you breathe out of your nose loudly; then that is not a bad life or a bad legacy. I hope something in this rambling helped you crips and non-crips and remember I believe in you.